Oddly Me

I’ve been thinking a lot about how much depression really taints our lives. It’s not something that most people care to talk about because the majority of the population doesn’t want to hear about how bad your day has been or what went wrong. Instead, the world expects you to be happy at all times. Never once do they let up on you, allowing you to feel even an ounce of something different. I feel that’s one of our worst qualities, as a society, is driving the thought into our minds that we always have to be in a state of happiness. I’ve let quite a few people in on my depression over the years and while it may not be a topic of great discussion, it’s certainly a vital bit of life that we all need to try and understand. We may not always be happy, and that’s okay. Sadly, not many people see it that way.

Many types of people are affected by this at least once during their cycle of life. Sometimes we don’t really admit to it, but when you’re alone, trying your best to cling to that happiness that was beaming while you were out and about with your friends, you start to feel that spark dwindle. Depression has a way of tearing it all down, stripping that happiness bit by bit until there is nothing left. Some of you are probably reading this thinking yes, that’s exactly how I feel. On the other hand, there are those who have no idea what I’m talking about. They’re either in denial, or they have yet to experience something so terrible and draining.

It all boils down to two types of depression. When we hear someone say that they’ve been depressed, our first thought is never, oh, they must be suffering from clinically diagnosed depression. Usually, what they are referring to is a temporary depression that will subside in the next day or so. With that being said, the question is asked… why do we do this? Why do we try so hard to make others think we are happy? Because of a terrible myth that we always have to be happy. It’s looming over our heads every damn day. Certain people may fake being happy for the simple reason they don’t want to go into detail about why they are so depressed, but because we are so pressured into being happy, it’s become a sickening game of “happy or nah”.

As someone who suffers from depression, as well as anxiety, on a daily basis, I can confidently say, without a single doubt… there is hope. We don’t always ‘have’ to feel happy. Sometimes it’s okay to simply not be okay. What matters is that we pull ourselves out of the darkness once we are done wallowing about within its depths. By telling yourself it’s okay to feel what you feel, freedom is found. The freedom is certainly not immediate, and it doesn’t take away all of your problems, but it helps that much more.

So, what was the point of this article? Honestly, I wanted to express just the tip of an iceberg that I deal with everyday by talking about it. Letting people know they’re not alone in this macabre of darkness. And hopefully, it helps someone is a tiny way, by letting them know that what they’re feeling, they don’t have to feel alone. Realizing we’re not alone with our demons makes it just a little bit more bearable than yesterday.