Oddly Me

Emotional state: better

Mental state: lots and lots of thinking

Sometimes you just don’t feel like you belong in this world; It’s that simple. But just because you feel that way, it doesn’t make it true. If you’re alive, you belong in this world. You have a reason, a purpose. You are meant to be here. Whether we have lived hard lives, easy lives, or just some type of life that’s in between, we can say that we have all been through our fair share of bullshit. We’re supposed to find that one thing we are meant to do and often it’s a lot of different things.

I’m not perfect. I have a hard time remembering my own words some days. Certain evenings are easier than others, but when I’m really knocked down, my own advice is the last thing on my mind. Instead I turn to friends or family. Sometimes I just turn in and spend time alone. It all depends on what you need at the moment and listening to that quiet voice inside is the key. People always say “the voice inside” but it’s not really a voice. Not to me anyway. It’s more like a sensation, a vibration, a knowing that somehow you will be alright and sometimes you just know what to do. That’s where it begins. It all starts making sense when you listen to yourself and trust who you are.

So, when I’m feeling like I don’t belong anywhere…I close my eyes. I slow my breathing by doing some breathing exercises and I try to clear my mind. I imagine my thoughts slipping away slowly like clouds. Then I wait. I just sit and calmly meditate. Sometimes there are answers and sometimes there’s just silence. But it works. You won’t always know what to do, but you don’t always have to know. Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is nothing at all. Simply wait. Be patient. In all honesty, I think patience is something I could use right now.

Blessed Be )O(