Emotional level: 6
Mental level: 6
TODAY I LEARNED: There is more fresh water in the atmosphere than in all of the rivers on the planet combined.
Today I feel somewhat altered. It’s these dizzy days that make my anxiety flare up. Sometimes it’s just a lack of sleep, other times it’s part of my “over-thinking.” Two years ago (possibly longer?), when this entire anxiety ridden mess started, I was clueless. I thought something was wrong with my heart. I would soon find that my heart was and is completely fine, but anxiety was to blame. GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) is what they call it. What bothers me the most about it is that an anxiety attack can happen at any time. Even talking about anxiety attacks makes me anxious. I don’t like them…and since facing things you don’t like is a part of living, I figured I would talk about anxiety…just a bit.
Ever since I found the right medication, anxiety is only an issue here and there. I still deal with it every day, but I don’t get anxiety attacks as often. When the idea of medication was first presented to me, I said yes without hesitation. Normally I would have been against it and the entire idea of taking another pill would have required some deep thinking. However, at the time, I was so anxious, I didn’t care what I had to do to make it stop. Luckily I did find something that helps me and it’s cheap to boot!
Sadly, the meds don’t always keep the anxiety away. Days like this one really remind me to be thankful that I have such a strong support system in my friends and family. It also reminds me of how horrible anxiety can be. I want to point out that there’s a big different in just “being anxious” and suffering from anxiety. Before I went through it, I thought they were one in the same. For example: that feeling you get just before you’re about to go on stage is nothing compared to GAD.
On the bright side of it all, I’ve found a way to live with it. Sometimes you need reminding that you can’t let something like this take over your life. So, here’s that reminder: if you have something in your life that you feel controls you, take your power back. We all make our own choices everyday and we can choose to take control of our own lives. It IS possible to be in control, no matter who you are or what you’re going through. We as humans are capable of so many wonderful things. Take your light back. It’s never truly gone. ❤
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
– Albus Dumbledore
Blessed Be )O(